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Ebonics dis here

29 Aug

(This post contains language which may be offensive to some readers. In other words, I say fuck. Deal.)

What a sad, sad state the US has come to when they have to hire people who are fluent in Ebonics to help nab criminals. I mean, fo’ real tho, sheeit. How fucked up is The States that they now have to have people who speak this “language” (notice the quotes) in government business? That is some whacked out shit, but I have complete and total faith in the US. I mean, if any country can fuck up a language, the US can, you got to give them that.

(fade into a memory)I remember walking through Atlanta airport, asking someone for directions and not only did this lady have the most unreal hair I have ever seen (it was shaped like a weaved hat) but she spoke some fucked up version of English (must have been Ebonics) and I told her, “Sorry, but could you repeat that, in English(and yes I emphasized it like a smart ass, would you expect any less out of me?) and she got mad (fade out of a memory).

Sorry, but if you are working with the public, then the public needs to understand you. Gawd, I sound racist, but you know what, I don’t give a crap because this is how I feel. Why do people feel the need to butcher a language to the point that they are completely incomprehensible. People need to understand you and when you speak like you don’t have any common sense or any grasp of the English language, not only do you look dumb, but you make your race (what ever it may be), your nationality (whatever it maybe be) and your employer look  ignorant.

Personally, I think it is a poor excuse for not paying attention in school and not grasping even the simplest part of the language—proper pronunciation. As far as I know, there isn’t a form of Ebonics in any other language. It is called “Black English”, “Black vernacular”, “Black dialect” or, my personal preference and therefore my favourite name for it, “Substandard English”.
Yes, substandard.

(dramatic pause)

All I have to say is this: it says something about the “language” Ebonics when the job opening is for the DEA.


Remind me not to move to Atlanta.

Kay Burley: She’s a little bit mad isn’t she?

9 May

(Sorry, the sound on the video isn’t great, you’ll need to turn your speakers up!)

A Twitter campaign is calling for the sacking of Sky News presenter, Kay Burley after a complete dog’s breakfast of an interview she conducted with David Babbs from campaign group, 38 Degrees.

This is the same Kay Burley who mistook an Ash Wednesday mark on Joe Biden’s forehead for a bruise. That might have been forgivable if it wasn’t for the fact that Ms Burley was brought up as a Catholic, so really should have known better.

It’s also the same Kay Burley who made Peter Andre cry, then claimed she did it for his own good – ’cause she’s nice like that. What may look like spite to the rest of us is actually the outward manifestation of a truly caring personality.

However, despite all that I don’t think Kay should be sacked, after all, who in their right mind would employ her? Instead, I think we should just learn to love her strange little foibles and accept the fact that she is to journalism what the Simpsons’ Cat Lady is to intelligent discourse.


Literacy and communication

23 Apr

Google’s blog is highlighting today the importance of World Book Day and The Literacy Project.

Its shocking to think that 1 in 5 adults is illiterate. But as I reminded someone at a party on Saturday night, even if the WHOLE world was literate, a world without books is useless. And Google is doing good by joining UNESCO is attacking the nexus of the problem, books spawn literacy and vice versa, and that is often forgotten.

When I was in High School, I remember going to debate in township schools, and invariably the debate would happen in the ‘library’. I use this term partially, since most of these rooms had few if any reading materials, let alone books. Generally there were government sex education comics, a couple of bibles, and possibly a few donated books; but the sheer LACK of books shocked me, and reminded me that literacy without something to read is useless; it becomes nothing but a perfunctory aspect of government action, and not the development of a educated civic collective.

Couple that shock of a LACK of books, with the abundance of books and bookshops in the UK. I never fail to be amazed at how much reading is going on in the UK. It’s great for the health of that nation, as an outsider, and surely provides them with a national competitive edge far beyond Monty Python sketches and good television.

Literacy with books leads to better communication. And in an increasingly globalised and competitive world driven by information, and subsequently knowledge, we can’t ignore the VITAL nature of good communication (and therefore literacy) in the battle for competitiveness.

Literacy, like the free market, is not a zero sum game. Like trade, the more literate actors in the ‘market’ of ideas communicated in local communities and the world, comes to benefit all communities in ever greater extends.

Considering this then, should we not be considering the inclusion of literacy as a basic human right. To deny someone access to the well of human ideas, is no different to the denial of good drinking water to the thirsting man. He might be able to survive on muddy waters, but he will only thrive if he has access to the true benefits of the written word, and the education that provides.

The revolution of the printing press cannot overthrow the dangerous ideas in the third world until populations are literate and educated.

It then is a great fear that governments hide their populations from truth by keeping them in a perpetual uneducated, yet partially literate (i.e. no books – such as in many [sadly most] schools in South Africa) state, so as to ensure a fearful and sheepish populace which can be stretched, beaten and oppressed without the knowledge that a better existence awaits them should they strive for freedom and the removal of despots and tyranny.